Reduced to 7th Graders by Frozen Yogurt

Ok, over the past year or so the Porter-Zimny-Busch gang (that's Me, Brian and Brian's cousin Alex who lives here, for those wondering) has become increasingly obsessed with frozen yogurt from TCBY.

It probably all started with Alex. Sure we liked frozen yogurt and ice cream before, but then Alex started with this whole " Sunday is Sundae day!" thing. So we'd go to the store, get all the fixin's and make Sundaes on Sunday. Roughly 10 lbs later, we decided single servings of non-fat frozen yogurt were more reasonable.

Which brings us to the problem. TCBY closes at 9. We never decide we want frozen yogurt until 8:45. When we didn't have Miss M, it wasn't that hard to make it there in time. Now we only make it there about 1/2 the time. More than once have they been locking up as we pull in.

This was a problem until Brian found out about this place, The Big Spoon down on Jst. It's a self serve frozen yogurt place. You pick up a cup and choose from 6 different flavors of frozen yogurt. Then you choose from a table of liquid toppings like caramel sauce, hot apple pie filling, magic shell, etc. Then you move on to the hard toppings, phase I. These are the maraschino cherries, your basic candy bar pieces like twix, snickers, etc. Then it is hard toppings phase II. This consists of an entire wall o' candy. Gummy bears, sprinkles, chocolate chips, bubble gum, Nerds, etc. When you are done, you take it up to the register and they weigh it.
FYI, it's cheap and it closes at 11. What could be better? Oh, right, if it was next door. Actually, it's probably better for all our health if it is at least a little drive away.
Here was a review I read of the Big Spoon :
"The bowl size at Big Spoon is directly proportional to the size of your ass if you eat here too often."

Anyways..... for all of us who went to Cal Poly, or were lucky enough to spend time in SLO, we hold a place called Bali's close to our hearts. It is a local frozen yogurt shop with 2 locations in SLO, running on the same basic principles. Get your yogurt, pile on the toppings, get it weighed and pay. A very good deal and open until either 11 or midnight, I can't remember. What I do remember is getting my cup of yogurt, putting on a layer of toppings, and then filling another cup with toppings. Because when you eat that first layer of toppings off, you'll want more. See? It's a great strategy. Eat, sprinkle, eat, sprinkle. God, I loved Bali's.

I read a review of The Big Spoon that claimed that a couple who went to Cal Poly moved here to Sacramento and the woman missed Bali's so much that they opened something just like it - The Big Spoon.
I need to buy those people a drink.

But on with the story. So we have the whole gang there, Alex, Brian, me, and Miss M all zonked out in her car seat, unaware of the yogurt extravaganza swirling around her.
Us "adults" are munching on our yogurt, people watching. I snarkily comment on the fashion choices of some girls standing near us.
But then one of the workers comes over, sweeping candy pieces off the floor. As she leans over, I notice that her jeans are about to give her plumber's crack. The waist line is going lower, lower, but no crack is showing. It gets to the point that crack is eminent. But, no crack. It's hard to explain, but the whole things made it look like she had no crack. I mean none. Can you be born with a really short crack? I mean, 2/3 butt cheek showing, and no crack? It was a modern miracle. Alex and I marveled over it. We couldn't belive that no crack showed. The amazingness of it is hard to describe.
Brian says he's gonna use the bathroom before we head out. He walks off, but immediately comes back and reports:
"I'll wait. The handle to the bathroom is covered in strawberry sauce".
Laughter ensues. We realize that frozen yogurt has the ability to turn us into 7th graders. One more reason to go.